Spring has sprung early here in the old country. The bees are buzzing, the birds are singing, and the tight t-shirts are adorning the co-eds once again. It’s one of the perks of living in a college town, I dare say. Temperatures have once again broken the magical 60-degree marker, and a young man’ thoughts and all that.

Spring is also the annual renewin’ o’ the residence permit time. Even though I’m theoretically moving to England in couple of days, I figured I’d take one last shot at the Permanent Resident Alien status. It’s a regular tug of war between me and the Ausländerbehörde (foreigner’s office). So far, there have been a few hurdles:

• Expired German residency prevented entry permit to Great Britain (that’s why I’m still here in Germany, actually)
• Renewal of German residency denied because my passport expires in August (6 month minimum)
• German residency permit renewal granted because I went to a different person at the same office
• Passport sent off to British Consulate, where it may or may not be at this very minute
• Permanent alien status pondered by new officer at Ausländerbehörde, but doubtful because I don’t earn enough money[^1]
• Both entry permit to Great Britain and German permanent resident status endangered because my passport is now full

Yes, after traveling to every corner of the globe for 10 straight years, my trusty old passport is finally full. And since visas are physically stuck to a full page of your passport, sometimes 2 pages even, the poor government employee who can’t find an empty page will probably reject your application outright. There are spaces here and there for a quarter-page stamp; if I could defrag that bastard I might have a shot.

[^1]: Apparently, to gain a permanent residential visa in German you need to earn a surplus of 1158,€ per month after income taxes, rent, health insurance, etc. etc. I don’t know anybody living here who earns that much money.