You Bitch!
25th of September, 2017

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Creepy

Have you ever done something, sitting around on your own, that you found...unsettling?

I’m sitting here in my apartment, programming some sort of meaningless eye-candy for some customer I’ve never met. I gave up listening to music when I work, so I have to make my own noise. Being a self-employed, work-at-home, recluse-by-nature geek, I haven’t brushed my teeth, showered, or even put on pants today. It’s 5:30 in the P.M., and I need a shave.

So, I’m sitting there fondling the Powerbook, gazing longingly at it’s sleek form, inspired design, and oh-so-curvy air vents, relishing the feel of the tactile-feedback mechanism under the warm, pliant keyboard that, though I’ll never understand, I breathlessy appreciate. I’m a man, goddamnit. A man with needs, such as ergonomic design and thoughtful engineering.

There I am, trying to figure out how to make an image filter process a tiny 25,000-pixel image in under an hour, stroking my computer, sitting around in my underwear at dinnertime, filthy and unwashed, and I realize I’m singing that wading-pool song Gollum was singing when he brained that fish in Two Towers.

Fuck me, that’s creepy.

Comments

Kv

Nothing wrong with you, Precious...except that to elicit proper outrage over your treatment of yourself, you need to wear your underwear on your head. Ssssss....

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