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20th of April, 2019



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G'scheits - German Blogging


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Picture #1


Rube (R), in full painter regalia, prepares to rawk this house. White.


Uncle JuJu

Man, I remember that. I lived in Germany twice for a total of 6 years. The second time in Cologne, and when I moved out, I painted the whole 125 m2 apartment myself, including the metal door frames and radiators. Took me weeks, after work. And then the prick Hausverwalter tells me that there were "schattierungen" on the wallpaper, and the whole apartment had to be re-papered. Which would have cost 5000DM. You should have seen the bastard's face when I told him to keep the Kaution (1800DM), go and fuck himself, threw my keys on the floor and walked out. My buddy who lived across the hall said that the police came looking for me shortly thereafter, since I jad "assaulted" him with my foul language. I work for a German insurance company, and I have a few really good friends there still, but I really have a love/hate relationship with the country. When I live there the fucking Germans make me crazy, when I'm not there, there's a lot that I miss about it-- the quiet sundays, the 6 weeks vacation, etc. Great blog.


When my husband was deployed a while back I painted our dining room at our place in Colorado...It was Dusty Rose and it was gorgeous but once that paint hit the wall and was like a bottle of Pepto-Bismol exploded in that was PINK! My husband was home maybe a week before he painted it back white...anyhoo..fixin to paint the 2nd floor in our new german landlord is awesome, he never comes around, he don't care what I do around here..I got so lucky.


Alright...I confess: I'm still stumped. Why the hell do you have to paint a place in which you no longer live?


That's exactly what I was thinking.


Well, guys, that's a very good question. Here in Germany, when you rent an apartment, you sign a contract that usually says how much you have to renovate the apartment when you move out. In my case, it says I have to paint all the walls white.

Renting is a very complicated issue over here, like pretty much everything else. There are all sorts of rules to follow. For example, you have to paint the walls of your living spaces at least once every three years; although I don't know anybody who does that.

I'd tried to make a deal with my landlady: In exchange for not painting the walls white, I'd leave the flooring in, which I'd laid when I moved in 5 years ago. So, she yanked me around for a good month after I moved out; and finally decided she'd rather have white walls than nice floors. Which is a joke, because the carpets underneath the wood are total shit, which is why I laid flooring down in the first place. Now I'm painting the walls, and then I've got about 60 meters sq. of worthless flooring to dispose of.


2 or 3 fights w/ fully automatic paintball guns + 1 bonfire = problem solved. Come on, dude...think SOLUTIONS!

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