Here I am again, waiting on the old lady in the Worst Bar in the World. The Worst Bar in the World, by the way, has improved itself. It, like a woman, responds to slaps and degradations in the correct manner, vis it adjusts, tries to understand the reasons for its punishment, evolves. The Worst Bar in the World is no fool, and has its sights set on my money apparently. In short, the staff no longer spends its time smoking cigarettes behind the bar, wondering what all these people want from them. They pour beer now, and do it quickly.

On the other hand, there’s the New Worst Bar in the World. I’m not a completely negative person, so I’ll start with the positives: The New Worst Bar in the World is very clean. This is probably because after about 11 P.M. the staff do nothing other than clean the kitchen. They are nowhere to be found. You can walk in, take a seat, have a cigarette*, and proceed to load all the furniture and silverware that isn’t currently being polished into the back of your car and drive home, nary an eyebrow raised. The New Worst Bar in the World is purportedly without pre-defined closing time, meaning, from my admittedly biased perspective as customer, that you can can drink all night, it being a bar and all. Such tag-lines can be deceiving, of course. Open all night means different things to different people, and here the customer is not always right. The bar, as you or I would understand it, closes about 11:15. After that point, it becomes more of a non-contact peep-show for dishwashing fetishists. The staff are not to be disturbed, and, if you don’t mind staying overnight until the doors open up again, you can stay as long as you want.

The service in Europe sucks, still, even 2 months after my return.

*-The New Worst Bar in the World hides the ashtrays behind the bar, so you’ll have to ash on the floor.