Ah, well. It’s to be expected.

I’ve done a little sociological background reading on my neighbors here, the crafty and sneaky europeans. Mainly, I’m trying to get a grip on exactly what it is that’s always running through their stunningly coiffed heads.

They’re not like us.

Euros are definitely on a difference political scale as americans. In the U.S., there’s conservatives, and liberals. And liberal-liberals. And neoconservatives, whatever that really means.

I’m fairly moderate, in a classically conservative, small government, free-enterprise patriotic sort of way. Which is fine with me. It’s definitely true that some people just can’t cut it on their own, even with (or without, as the case may be) their family to take care of them. For example, drug-addicts with mental illness just might need to be taken care of at some point. Worst case scenario.

In Europe, of course, american-style conservatism isn’t allowed. It’s not even conceivable. You’re covered every step of the way by Daddy State. Can’t fall down, as the Net of Social Goodwill will catch you, set you down gently, or not, if you want to be held. It’s all very depressing, really.

So, on the “far right” of European politics you’ve got the values of, say, Michael Moore. That’s about as conservative as it gets over here. That’s why they hate Bush so much. Well, that, and because they’re told to. You know how fashionable it is to hate Dubya among the elitists in the U.S. Well, absolutely everyone over here is an elitist.

You pay taxes over here in ways you can’t even imagine, all to cover the smothering social systems and the army of “Beamters”, the civil servants that cannot be fired no matter how bad the economy is, or how badly they do their job, and always, always get a raise.

All in all, the power in the hands of a European consumer amount to about 10% of his income, or even less. You pay about 40% income tax. Then social security is another 10%. Then (in my case) 300 more (~9%) for the highly vaunted health insurance. So, before you’ve even gotten your money, 60% of it’s gone.

Then, there’s the outrageous 16% value-added tax that’s slapped onto every transaction. 78%. another 15% or so for rent and utilities. Before you know it, you’ve got about 7% of your money with which to define how you’re going to live.

For groceries, entertainment, gasoline, car payments, car insurance, clothing, beer, cigarettes, pot, and all the other things that define you as a person you can devote about 7% of your money. This is the money that keeps the small businessman afloat, and encourages entrepeneurship and, to a certain degree, innovation. This is your “luxury” spending, which unfortunately includes all the things that are actually necessities.

The rest you leave up to his Highness the King. That’s what allows the Europeans to be driven down like they are. They have a form of trust with their governments that is totally alien to an American. To us, the government are the sneaky bastards who are trying with all their might to steal our money and spend it on drugs and hookers and paying the cops to keep us from doing it. Over here, the government is your friend.

A german jury, for example, isn’t made up of randomly-chosen citizens. If you are accused of a crime, you’re tried by professional, state-employed jurors. Would Americans ever trust the government enough to let them do that?

I guess Euros are still the monarchists at heart. Heck, half the countries over here are quite literally still monarchies. Don’t get me wrong: I like it over here, once you get past politics. It’s just that in the past year or so, there isn’t much to talk about except for politics.

Sigh.